The Fire Went Wild (Home is a Fire Book 2) Read online

  “Hey, Lana Banana,” he said, trying to set the tone.

  “What’s he doing here?” She wasn’t smiling. Well hello to you, too.

  Luke sighed, undeterred. “Lana, I invited Derek. May we come in?”

  In lieu of a response, she simply stepped to the side and waved us in, without a word. She stuck her head out the door and did a quick left right. Heaven forbid anyone see us? It was going to take a miracle to bring these two back together.

  “We brought some vodka, Cointreau and cranberry,” Luke said, offering the goods we picked up from the liquor store.

  “I used to work in a bar in college,” I offered, trying to make some headway. “I can make a pretty mean Cosmo.”

  “What, no little paper umbrellas?” She said sarcastically as she turned on her heels and walked towards the kitchen. Luke turned back to me and made a face. At least she was attempting humor. Maybe there was some hope, after all?

  He placed the bag down on the island in the kitchen and I scooted around to the other side, leaving them standing together. She was staring at him with her arms folded across her chest and a scowl on her face. He had his hands in his jean pockets and a shy grin on his face, and I wondered if those dimples and blue eyes affected her in the same way they did me?

  He reached his arms out to hug her and she playfully batted him away.

  “No,” she said, petulantly. “I’m so pissed at you. How could you do this to me?”

  “Lana, I didn’t do anything to you. I did something for me. What choice did you give me? You basically threatened me with a life of silence, and I wasn’t going to have that anymore. I’d done that for too many years. I needed to come clean.”

  She looked angry. “Don’t you see that you’ve embarrassed yourself, Luke? Embarrassed the family? How could you?”

  Appearances were everything to Lana Walcott. In high school she always had the right purse, the right clothes, the right friends following at just the right number of steps behind. Everything she ever wanted was handed to her, but now she was facing something she didn’t want, and her big brother was going to suffer for it, not her.

  She turned away from him and walked over to the white satin sofa and positioned herself regally, one arm stretched across the back, knees together, her legs crossed at the ankles. Luke followed and sat on the second couch, opposite. It was a Walcott Face Off. Who would budge first? I busied myself with making drinks, just wishing I could disappear.

  “I don’t know what you expect to accomplish here,” she said. “What is this? A slumber party? Is a pizza delivery boy going to show up and strip for us? Are we going to paint each others’ nails?”

  She was digging in, being nasty to see if she could get a rise out of him. Outwardly she was acting like she was enjoying it, but it didn’t seem genuine. Hurting him wouldn’t help her feel better, and he could see that. She was a wounded animal, just lashing out.

  “If that’s what you want, sure,” he said, calmly, not taking the bait. “It’s not my thing, but if it will make you feel better, I’d try anything for you, Lana. You know that.”

  “What happened to you, big brother?”

  “Nothing, Lana,” he answered. “I’m still the same Luke. I’m just more honest now about who I am and what I want.”

  I placed a tray of Cosmopolitans down on the coffee table between the sofas, but neither of them moved. Lana was staring intently at Luke, unflinching in her steely resolve.

  “Is this the part where we say what Sex and the City character we are?” she asked, pointedly. “I’m Carrie.” She was really taking this as far as she could.

  “Maybe I should step out for a bit,” I offered. “Give you two some room.”

  “That’d be great,” she said coldly, without even looking at me. “This is a family matter. Back entrance is that way.” She flung her left hand up and pointed behind her.

  “Derek, please sit down with me. I’d like you here.” Luke looked up at me and gave me a pleading look. I was uncomfortable, but this was for him. For us. He wanted us to try and fix it, together.

  I sat down next to him on the couch and he leaned forward, interlacing his fingers and placing his forearms on his knees, really looking her in the eyes, again.

  “Lana, I know what you’re doing, and it won’t work. You did this to me when we were kids, and it didn’t work then, either. You can poke and prod and bug me all you want, but I won’t break. Remember those staring contests we had? I won every time. You’d get distracted or bored or thirsty and just walk off. We’d sit in the back of the car on trips and you’d poke me, non-stop from home to church, during the service and then back again, but I never cared. I gave up even locking my bedroom door, because you’d jimmy it open or start knocking non-stop or just walk in whenever you’d please. I let you get away with everything, Lana. Maybe I shouldn’t have, but I loved you. I still do. You’re my little sister, and I’ll do anything to protect you and make sure you’re happy, even at my own expense. But maybe things need to change, now. I can’t protect you anymore, like I did when we were kids. I’m trying to be honest with you here. I’m not asking you to embrace this with open arms, just yet. It’s still taking Father and Rosa some time. But you can at least try and meet me halfway. Can you do that for me?”

  She relaxed her body language, just a touch. Something he said had found its way inside of her, and she appeared to be mulling it over.

  “I can’t believe you told Daddy and Rosa before me,” she admitted, softly. “That hurt, Luke. That hurt me. I’m your sister. We share everything.”

  “I’m sorry, Lana. I didn’t plan it that way on purpose. I wasn’t thinking clearly at the time. A lot happened really fast with Derek, and I was trying to fix a situation that I didn’t think was fixable. I should have spoken to you all at once. I am sorry about that. Really, I am.”

  We seemed to have reached an impasse. She remained quiet, thinking. Her face still held a steady scowl, but she no longer looked like she was going to pounce. I just wish she had taken a few sips of that drink. I know how badly I wanted mine right now, but I wasn’t going to be the only one reaching for the booze.

  “You were supposed to marry Amber, Luke.”

  “Seriously? You gotta be kidding me, now.” He shook his head. “Amber? Did you forget that she cheated on me in college, and the product of that pairing just happens to be Jett, who’s currently terrorizing Derek? Honestly. I can’t believe you’d wish Amber on anyone.” He leaned back and placed his hands on his knees, clearly frustrated. She didn’t respond and the silence grew unbearable between them, again. I wanted so badly to reach for that drink, but I didn’t dare. Finally, he spoke up. “Excuse me. I’m a bit… I need to go use the bathroom. Will you two be all right?”

  “Yeah, of course,” I said, lying. Lana said nothing.

  He kissed me on the cheek as he rose to leave, and I could see the look of horror on her face. For every step forward we had just taken, we were about to take two steps back.

  A good ninety seconds of uncomfortable silence passed before she looked at me squarely in the eyes and said, “I blame you.”

  “Really? I blame Tarzan,” I said, finally finding my voice. I reached down for that Cosmo and took a healthy sip.

  “What?” she snapped.

  “Nothing. You wouldn’t understand.”

  “Oh, I understand enough.” Here it comes. “I know your type. You saw a handsome rich guy and you did everything you could to snare him. You saw a big payday. You confused him, messed with his mind. I’ve seen it before. And now he wants me to ‘get to know’ you? But you know what? You mean nothing to me. Nothing. The only person who matters to me is my brother. This isn’t about being straight or gay or bi. I could care less who he sleeps with. This is about my brother and my family. You don’t matter to me. At all. You’re insignificant. And no matter how hard you try, you will never, ever be good enough for him. And I will do everything in my power to make sure he sees the light.”
/>   “LANA! That’s about enough.” Luke was standing at the hall, just steps from us. There was no telling how long he had been standing there listening to her diatribe. I was in shock. This wasn’t about being gay, at all? Is that what she said? She just thinks I’m a gold digger?

  “Derek, let’s go.” Luke’s voice rang out in the room. “I think we’ve overstayed our welcome. I don’t want to hang around where my boyfriend isn’t welcome.”

  We walked out without saying another word, and he slammed the door forcefully behind us.

  Luke unlocked the car remotely with his keychain and walked over to the passenger seat and opened the door for me. Always the gentleman, even when he was stressed. He closed my door and walked around and climbed into the driver’s seat, but his hands just gripped the wheel while he stared ahead, not moving.

  “I’m sorry about that,” he said. “That stuff she was spouting at the end. I don’t believe it. She doesn’t know you like I do. She’s just worried about getting her hands on Father’s money, but it’s more than that. When Mother died, she felt abandoned. They sent us to therapy. Rosa filled the space, but things were never exactly the same. Does she think that I am abandoning her now? Is that it? Because this is obviously about me and not you. I’m so sorry, babe.”

  “It’s okay,” I said, quietly. “I didn’t expect that either.”

  He started the car, but still didn’t put it into gear. I could see the wheels spinning in his head.

  “Luke?”

  “Yeah,” he answered, with more than a hint of anger still in his voice.

  “Are you open to just one nugget of advice?” I asked.

  “Not really,” he answered.

  “Well, you’re getting it. In the future, when someone asks you what Sex and the City character you are, the instinct is always to say Carrie, because she was the star of the show. But really, it’s Miranda. She got everything she wanted in the end. A house, a loving husband, a kid, a nanny, a car, a great career. What did Carrie get? A handsome man who left her at the altar and a lot of shoes. I’d take Miranda’s deal, any day.”

  He turned to look at me.

  “You’re really messed up. And I love you,” he said. “You know that?”

  “Yeah. I do.”

  He put the car in gear and we started towards home.

  “We can put on a show!” Kit exclaimed.

  “Hold up, y’all,” I said. “This isn’t a Judy Garland/Mickey Rooney musical from the 1940s.”

  We were gathered in our regular booth at the Firelight. Me, Luke, Tommy, Meredith, Kit and Shawn. Bammy and Michael were out on their own, but honestly, it just felt like she was laying low for a bit, on purpose. I understood, all too well.

  “No, silly!” Kit placed her beer down, for emphasis. “A fundraiser! At the gallery! Meredith and I want to donate the space so you can raise money for your lawsuit, if you need to go forward with that, ya know?”

  Luke jumped into the conversation. “That’s sweet of you, but we don’t need any money. We’ve got that part covered. I’ve had a few conversations with my father’s lawyer, but he suggests we wait a bit to see how this plays out, rather than cause more friction by making the first move. I’m inclined to agree.”

  “Okay,” said Meredith, slowly. “So you don’t need money. That’s cool. So instead of raising cash, let’s raise awareness!” Her hands were flailing about, excitedly. “Let’s put together a super cool night with strippers and drag queens and artists and really show Parkville how much support you two have in the community.”

  I turned to Luke to gauge his reaction.

  “How ‘bout it, babe?” I squeezed his knee under the table. He reached for my hand and held it in his.

  “Let’s do it,” he said, defiantly.

  And the Love All benefit was born.

  9

  LOVE ALL

  It was the night of the big event, and I was a little nervous.

  Since most of my stuff was still at Mom’s place, I went there to get ready for the evening. It was so important for me to have her and Uncle Barry by my side, and they both wanted to come and support Luke and me.

  “What should I wear?” my mom asked, as she rifled through her closets. I was sitting on her bed, just an hour before I was supposed to go over to Luke’s.

  “Do you have anything sparkly?” I suggested. “It’s kind of an arty night. Not too crazy, but not too conservative, either. I mean, there won’t be anyone in tuxedos and ball gowns.”

  “I hope not,” she said with a grimace. “I can’t compete with that crap. You know that. If I could go in my house robe, I would.” She laughed.

  “How about that one?” I pointed at a dress that was a bit shoved to one side of the rack. “The lacy one? I always liked that.”

  “This? Oh, my. I’m not even sure I can fit into that one, anymore. Your dad always liked that one, you know?”

  I ignored the remark about my dad. It had been ages since he and I had spoken, and I didn’t want to deal with any extra emotions on a night that was already expected to be pretty emotional.

  “Well, I like it,” I said. “Give it a try. If it doesn’t work, go for that sequined top and just pair it with some nice black pants and a low heel. Hair down. Just give it a good brush.”

  “What would I do if you weren’t here?” she asked.

  “Have a saner life,” I answered, truthfully. “Listen, I love you, but I need to run and get changed myself. I have to meet Luke soon. See you there? Love you!” And I gave her a quick peck on the cheek.

  “I’m proud of you honey, I really am,” she said, calling after me.

  “Mom, do not make me cry! My face will get all puffy. I’m outta here.”

  I bounded up the steps and into my room. I had laid out a few options on my bed. Luke and I have different tastes in clothes, so we weren’t the types to discuss what we were wearing beforehand. There was no chance we would show up in matching outfits. I was this close to choosing a t-shirt with an obscure band name and a pair of comfortable ratty blue jeans, but I changed my mind at the last minute. I didn’t want to wear a suit, and I’m not the tucked in button down shirt kind of guy, so I went with a black blazer, t-shirt and jeans. Very hipster, but hopefully not too played out.

  “Barry?” I banged on the bathroom door. I could hear the shower running, but I couldn’t hang around for him to finish before I left. “I need to run to Luke’s. See you at the party later?”

  “It’s a date, Dolly!” he shouted through the door.

  I was kind of on autopilot as I drove to Luke’s place. At this point, Willie Nelson could probably drive himself there without much effort from me. My head was really out of it. Were we really about to have a fundraiser for social equality in my hometown? How did we get to this place? I was nervous as all get out, and I hoped there was something good in the future, and not scary. My head was swimming with a mixture of fear and optimism.

  I parked the car and walked in Luke’s door and could immediately smell his cologne. They say that out of our five senses, smell is the most linked to memory. Well, the scent of Luke Walcott was still enough to drive me wild.

  “Babe, I’m here!” I called out as I headed down the hall to his bedroom. I caught sight of him standing in front of his bathroom mirror, trying to make the perfect knot in his tie. Khakis, Ralph Lauren Oxford cloth button down and brown leather loafers. The blue blazer was hanging on the doorknob. My weekend football hero in his traditional Southern uniform.

  “Can you help me with this?” He was clearly frustrated. “I keep making it too short.”

  “Here,” I said. “Let me do it. Your damn chest keeps getting bigger. You forget to compensate.” I untied and retied it and the point landed perfectly at his belt line.

  “You look great,” he said, eyeing me up and down in the mirror. “Very New York. I like it.”

  “And you look like you’re ready to go on ESPN.”

  “Now you’re talkin’!” he smiled, then p
aused. “Are you ready for this?”

  “Yeah, I think so. It should be pretty cool. Kit and Meredith are so excited. They haven’t really shared so many details, but I trust them. Let’s do it?”

  “Let’s do it.” Kiss. Boom. Out the door.

  Meredith and Kit did, indeed, go all out, and then some.

  The evening was called “Love All.” Simple, to the point, and without any hit-you-over-the head “gay agenda,” so as not to scare some of the less vocal supporters away. I thought it was a perfect theme.

  Since Luke and I had requested that no funds be raised for us specifically, the girls decided to partner with The Human Rights Campaign. The HRC set up a table just inside the door where donations could be collected for the general cause of equality in the state of Tennessee. I felt proud to be a part of that. The Supreme Court ruling for marriage equality was not the end of the struggle, and we knew that.

  The gallery looked amazing. There were small bee lights strung up that crisscrossed the ceiling and then danced down the walls, between paintings, sculptures and other works of art. Votive candles artfully lit the surfaces. A bar was set up on one side serving cocktails, while waiters passed trays of champagne. There was a bandstand set up on the other side of the room with a microphone and instruments. It was early, but the small rooms were already filling up with supporters.

  Kit and Meredith ran towards us as they saw us enter, champagne glasses in hand. Kit’s wardrobe theme tonight was androgyny, and she was pulling off her Dietrich tuxedo with panache, top hat included. Meredith was all gold and sparkles and curves. Tommy and Shawn waved from the bar, drinks in hand. They were more than content to let their girlfriends have their moment to shine while they talked music.